I’ve completed 3 weeks and I’m in Ketosis. YAY…. but that’s not been without some serious mental agony, cravings and yup, I’ll admit it right now… Intense feelings of GRUMPY.
It’s like a grumpy, irritable, even angry, and pissy being invaded me. I don’t usually think of myself as being grouchy or leaning toward a disposition of asshole… but dang it all, that’s the way I’ve been feeling. My inner patience with “idjets” vaporized and my tolerance for time wasters diminished to 0.0 All I can say is, thank the heavens for my hubinator, who too was having a bit of difficult time (hmmm… wonder if there’s any correlation to my crappy moods- I just wonder)… anyway, thank heavens for him because he has been so very helpful, nurturing and understanding of his seemingly touchy spousal unit. I recall, early on in our marriage, we both agreed that we both can’t be irritable and pissy at the same time… it just doesn’t work out so well. I became acutely aware of that this past week or so. But unfortunately, I just couldn’t seem to shake it.
I then had a really eye opening session with my diet coach and she shared with me a super cool tip sheet about Galanin. That crazy hormone in one’s brain that simply makes you CRAVE more high fat. Now, you may ask, what does Galanin have to do with feeling bitchy and intolerant? My last post, just the one leading to failure is where I’ve been emotionally. Feeling all deprived and such, and then cheating away on a bit of steak here, some chicken there… oh all well within the “no carb”, but not exactly on the plan either. And finally one night, I just mentally watched myself going back to the fridge. and on the one hand, it was crazy and the other, it was satisfying. The next day was my appointment and I described what I was doing. I was mentally berating myself for not being able to just control myself, just get it together and then I re-discovered (because I knew this, just didn’t know what the hormone was called). My happy go lucky brain/body was doing what it autta… making sure I got what I needed cuz there might not be any more.
And that led me to the realization that mind over matter is the method. Not a new concept, actually something we all have heard about, but what changes over time is the ability and or method of achieving this state. So I got a new perspective on it. If I am the impetus of kicking off this hormone, I can just not do that. Meaning choices again…. and realizing that I am after all a physiological person and innate sense of preservation built into my genetics is going to be a factor on this journey of weight loss.
I remember feeling really duped by this a few years back. It just didn’t seem fair that it’s so easy to gain weight… it didn’t seem fair at all. And it really bugged me. I still feel that, but in the end, I’m curious to find out that if I make the right choices and increase my physical activity… will it really be all that difficult? Those who are a bit further along on this journey tell me that’s the case… so I’m sure I’ll find out when I pass that mile marker!